Diet…… It’s Not About Me….

Just Thinking….

The Hubs and I just enjoyed a delicious after church lunch at Applebee’s, made even more enjoyable with the addition of a couple dear folks who joined us at our table. I had a steak with shrimp, a spinach stuffed portobello mushroom, and a veggie mixture of zucchini and broccoli. It was ab. so. lute. ly. delicious.

Now it would always probably be a delicious meal, but it was even more so today because the Hubs and I are dieting. Oh….. you’ve heard that story before? I know; I know. It’s a never-ending tale. Believe it or not, I was once a skinny minnie. That lasted until my freshman year in college, and then it was fight-the-fat from that year on.

I was so terribly thin as a child. Mom and Dad took me to the doctor, who ordered my tonsils out. The operation helped, but I remained puny. I had no curves, no shape; my clothes just hung on me or literally fell off. I still remember having to wear suspenders on my skirts and jeans to hold them up. When I was a senior in high school, I weighed less than 100 pounds. I simply breathed a prayer every day: “Lord, help me to weigh at least 100 for graduation.” I didn’t make that goal. But I more than made up for it in college.

Part of the problem was my activity level. Although I am a very happy little couch potato, curled up with a book, I was exceptionally active as a child and teen. Living on a farm was part of that. I had to walk the pastures, searching for the cows and drive them up to the barn every night. We walked a half mile lane to catch the bus…. and back up that lane in the afternoon. I was in marching band and we marched for an hour in the mornings before school and then also during our band class. And then we marched in all those parades and at half time shows….. I ate copious amounts of food, but just burned everything off.

Silly me. I never thought about the activity level changing so much at college. I kept on eating like a ravenous farm girl, and noticed around Easter that my spring clothes no longer fit. Back then, I tried this candy stuff (I think it was called Ayds), which was supposed to kill the appetite. Ha!!! It was so good, that I ate several pieces at one time… and the next day I killed off the box.

I tried Weight Watchers, First Place (which actually did help me), Atkins. I did the grapefruit diet, and all the other frivolous diets that looked strange. Nothing really seemed to work for long term. I would get really really hungry, and then all good intentions just went out the window. I joined a gym, and later joined Curves. It was good for me, but I had to come to some realizations on just how my body worked. I also had to come to some realizations about WHY I wanted to lose weight. Was it possible that I had the wrong goals, the wrong motivation??

I’m a slow learner in many ways. It took me decades to realize that my body worked better on protein than on sugar. I found that if I could feed my furnace some protein at several points during the day, then I fared better. The protein kept me from that wolf-like hunger. Sugar made me jumpy and made me lose focus. I lost most of my sugar cravings, but I still craved carbs in the forms of breads and noodles and dumplings. I also found that fats satisfied my hunger. Unfortunately, I was still gaining weight.

I had managed to stay between 130-135 most of the time when we lived in MO. That was still too much for my slight frame. But when we moved north, I began to eat…. probably out of depression over the move, and partly to occupy my time. The weight started to pile on. Going back on an Adkins style of diet helped some, but I really needed to lose more, and it just wasn’t budging.

So the Hubs and I are now doing something different. We wanted to try and jumpstart our bodies in a more controlled way and began using Ideal Protein products. These are some high protein products that are controlled on carbs and fats. We use a couple per day for meals and one as a snack. Then we fill in with some other proteins, such as fish or chicken or beef, etc., and with lots of healthy veggies and salads.

I was afraid that I would get hungry on this diet; hunger was what would derail me. The diet is very low fat and very low calorie. I was definitely hungry the first few days, but then that dissipated. Now the last couple of weeks, I haven’t even been hungry enough to have a snack in the evening. And I AM losing weight. I’m back down in the 130s range now after 5 weeks on the diet. My energy level is still high, I’m sleeping well, and feel great.

So….. back to Applebee’s. I was afraid to eat out, afraid that I would be tempted to make wrong choices, afraid that I would cave and eat the fries (or whatever starchy carb was out there). The steak was supposed to come with potatoes and the grilled mushroom, but when I asked if they could switch the potatoes for veggies, they didn’t blink an eye. So I had my protein and my wonderful veggies, and drank 2 1/2 cups of water with lemon. I am full and feel great!!!

Breakfast this morning was a high protein shake and coffee. Supper will be a big salad with more legal veggies. I’ll keep on drinking water, and tonight may have a high protein snack.

I had visions of my weight just dropping off my bones in no time flat. That vision was shattered. But it is dropping slowly, and I’m grateful. I want to look good for my dear hubby, I want to fit in my clothes again, I want to maintain my level of energy, I want to be able to stick around for many years and play with my grandkids. But the main motivation I have is to glorify my God. After all, I am His handiwork; I am a Temple where Jesus lives. I take that seriously.

Diet…. I hate it. But it’s not about me. It’s about honoring my God, and being there for all the wonderful people in my life.

I am so grateful for the abundance with which You have graced us. And that includes an abundance of food. Please help me make wise decisions about my meals, using Your bounty with care. Help me to care for this body, which is fearfully and wonderfully made. I am so sorry for all the times that I abused it with my over eating, and ask for Your strength to do better.

To God be the Glory….

Published in: on February 26, 2012 at 10:35 pm  Leave a Comment  
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