Hey! I’m Prayin’ Here!

Just Thinking…..

I’m a firm believer in the power of prayer. No doubt exists in my mind that God hears, cares and answers. Nevertheless, I had an interesting, but uncomfortable, prayer encounter yesterday that left me…. well… let me just tell you about it.

Two days ago, our son was hit by another driver, and the accident probably totalled the car. The car happened to belong to us, and we carried the insurance on it: just liability. The police took the info and made an accident report. But we have not found out the insurance info about the other driver yet, and are getting some run-arounds. It’s frustrating.

So I’m home doing laundry and putting fresh bedding on the bed. And I’m using my time to also pray: praying that the insurance situation will be resolved, praying that a cheap reliable vehicle can be found quickly, praising that no one was killed or seriously harmed.

Suddenly that little God-voice (you know the one: the one you can’t hear with your ears, but none-the-less is quite distinct in your heart/soul/mind/spirit) said to me, “Be still and listen.”

Me: Hey, I’m praying here!
Voice: Be still and listen.
Me: But I’m praising You!
Voice: Be still and listen.
Me: I’m bringing You all my cares, just like I’m supposed to do.
Voice: Be still and listen.
Me: Uh…. ok….. what do I……
Voice: Be still and listen.

At that point the wind was out of my sails. All during my prayer and conversation, I was still doing my ordinary work. I’m an ordinary kind of person. And prayer is an ordinary part of this ordinary life. And I must admit that it is also ordinary for me to be a worrier extrordinanrre, a multi-tasker, and to plan my life 20 years in advance. I’m a do-er, a git-‘er-done kind of girl. So this little exchange going on inside of me was well….. unordinary. Unsettling.

I stood still by the half-made bed, staring at the closed window blinds and wondering what to do next. As my thoughts settled and dissolved, the voice continued.

Voice: Have I ever deserted you in time of need?
Me: No, Lord.
Voice: Haven’t I always provided?
Me: Yes, Lord.
Voice: Haven’t I always been your sustainer; am I not able?
Me: I agree, Lord.
Voice: Am I not the same yesterday, today and forever?
Me: Yes, Lord.
Voice: Then why are you trying to manipulate Me?

What?!?

Me? Manipulate God?

The hard answer was yes. It was me. And deep down, that was really the core and root of what I was doing: trying to manipulate the Creator of the universe. I had it all planned: God opens the hearts and pocketbook of the insurance company. Check. God brings us a car. Check.

That was me: an ordinary wisp of a mortal, standing in the face of God, tellilng Him how to handle my situation. Truth to tell, I was shamed as I reflected on my attitude, and I remained still and quiet.

Today I am again praying. But I’m trying to be careful. I’m giving God my praise and petitions, and I’m trying to not tell Him how to fix it. I realize now, to my chagrin, that my prayer was all about me, and about how I was such a great prayer-person. I was doing the right thing, but with the wrong motive, and God saw right through it.

Father, conform me to Your image. Make me who You want me to be. Remind me, however You see fit, that You are in charge and that Your ways are not my ways. Father, forgive me for being presumptuous and for trying to manipulate You into doing my will. May Your will be done in Your time and Your way. Surprise me, Lord, with Your plans.

To God be the glory,
bug

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Published in: on October 14, 2010 at 3:10 am  Comments (5)  

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5 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Glorybug,
    Thank you for sharing your personal story. I’m reminded of two quotes from Priscilla Shirer which she said during her video presentation on Tuesday at our Bible Study:

    “Many times we focus our energy on our problem instead of focusing on the God who is able.” Priscilla Shirer

    My other favorite from her lesson on Tuesday morning:
    “While we are ‘wanting’ for the future – we are missing the blessing from God of the now.” Priscilla Shirer

    He is able!

  2. Hey my friend! I soooooo know what you are saying from the video! Is it really a coincidence that the video, the wreck and the prayer encounter all happened within the same time frame? Thanks for commenting!

  3. I so much enjoy the thoughts you write about. They seem to hit my own life also. I think you are gifted at connecting with people this way. Thanks for sharing your private moments.

  4. Sandie, Thanks for taking the time to write, and your kind words. Feel free to browse the rest of my blog. And give my best to Mike!!

  5. […] The busiest day of the year was October 14th with 71 views. The most popular post that day was Hey! I’m Prayin’ Here!. […]


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